This
blog is the sixth (and perhaps last) installment of the ongoing story
that deals with my past-life experiences. You may want to read my
previous blogs for the essential back story, but I can give you a brief
summary right here. Basically, in the later part of 2010, I learned that
I had a recent past-life as a man in Poland and also a recent past-life as a woman in Hollywood
(actress Carole Lombard). The two lives coexisted with each other,
which is a phenomenon called a "parallel existence". Needless to say, it
was a little weird discovering that my soul was in two bodies at the
same time, not to mention the fact that one of these incarnations was as
a woman. But the parallel existence and female incarnation were only
the tip of the iceberg (so to speak). Recently, I discovered that the
life in Poland and Hollywood were only two past lives...out of a whopping thirty-two. Yes, you heard me correctly: I have had 32 past lives!!!
Now,
you may be wondering how I arrived at such a discovery. Well, last
month I visited a palm reader named Jesse who suggested that I needed a
"spiritual cleansing" (read about the palm reading HERE).
Jesse insisted that I had a "darkness in my aura" that resulted from
past-life traumas. I consequently went home and tried to conduct the
cleansing myself (read how in the blog),
but I wasn't sure it had been completely effective. There was a feeling
in my gut that I hadn't gotten all the "darkness" out of my system.
At
first, I considered going back to Jesse, because she had said she could
cleanse me if I wanted her to. But she charged a good amount of money
for it ($150). Plus, the cleansing methods she described to me seemed a
little strange (it involved carrying candles around with me or something
along those lines). I'm sure whatever she did would have probably
worked, but I didn't feel very comfortable with her. I didn't really
want a stranger messing with my aura and energy field. What if she ended
up opening up another hole and allowed more negative energy to get in?
What if an entity or demon attached itself to me? Surely I didn't want
that to happen. But if I didn't trust Jesse with the cleansing of my
aura, who WAS I going to trust??? Well, it actually didn't take very
long for me to come up with another person.
See, for more than
ten years now, I have been a client of a woman named Beverly Holt who is
essentially everything from a healer to a dietitian to an allergist to a
homeopathic therapist to a Reiki master to a medium and a psychic. Over
the years, Beverly has helped "clear" unwanted energies out of my
system, including Lyme disease, drugs (mild ones like marijuana) and
even allergies. I mean, before I knew Beverly I was extremely allergic
to dairy products; whenever I ate a yogurt or drank milk I would get a
mean strep throat that was always difficult to get rid of. But after
Beverly cleared me of the allergy I could eat dairy without any problem
at all. I never got any more strep throats. It was almost miraculous
what she did for me.
Beverly has also been very successful in
clearing more intangible negative energies from my system, such as
feelings, fears, thought-patterns and even depressing worldviews. She
once cleared feelings of rejection, for example. And also feelings of
failure. One time Beverly even helped clear a feeling of hopelessness,
that the world was doomed.
Anyway, I figured if Beverly could
clear negative energies from my current life as Matt Burns then she was
probably the woman to see if I wanted to clear energies from my past
lives. So I gave Beverly a call, made an appointment with her, and found
myself in her Boston office only a week later.
To my surprise, I
found that it was easier to explain my situation to Beverly than I had
initially thought. Basically, I just told her that I recently uncovered
some past-life traumas and I thought it would be a good idea to cleanse
myself of any negative energy I've carried over from previous lives.
"Are you able to do this kind of a thing?" I asked her.
"Sure."
"And do you think it's something I need to do?"
Beverly asked my (spirit) guides whether this was a good idea and they gave her a definite...
"YES. Definitely."
But
they said they couldn't do it all in one cleansing. All my body could
clear at one time was energy from 13 lives...out of a whopping 32!
Yikes.
"I see you soldiering in some of them," Beverly added.
"And in others there's a lot of residual anger...at people who killed
you in the past."
Yes, apparently deep in my soul I was
essentially still pissed off at the people who had wronged me in
previous lives. And the more I thought about it, the more this all
started to make sense...because throughout my entire life, I've always
had rage inside of me. Honestly, I never knew why I had the rage. I
didn't have a rotten childhood. I wasn't abused in any way. I wasn't
bullied in school. I got everything I wanted for Christmas. But, still,
there was always rage inside of me, from almost as early on as I can
remember. And don't get me wrong: I rarely showed my rage to others. In
fact, I think a lot of people would be surprised to learn I had a
problem with anger. I've actually always been a very peaceful person
when it came to associating with people and I've hardly ever gotten into
a fight. But the rage has always been present, lingering in my chest
like a snake in the grass.
So maybe the source of my rage - this
whole entire time - has been from past lives. Honestly, it seems to be
the most probable explanation. I mean, think about it:
thirty-two-lives-worth of negative trauma is bound to leave some kind of
a mark. According to Beverly, I was murdered in some of these lives.
Killed in battles and burned in fires. Raped in Hollywood. Manipulated
by the Nazis in Poland. Fucked over in various ways. Screwed.
Victimized. Et cetera. Et cetera.
So, yes, with so much trauma
under my belt, perhaps it's easy to understand why I've always had
repressed rage, but I think the fact that I've even held onto so much
anger is a sign that I've been a rather immature soul this whole time. I
mean, who am I even angry at? The schmuck who killed me in
life-number-three? Or the rapist in the Hollywood life? The Nazis in the
Poland life? Honestly, if there's anybody to blame for my rage it's
myself. As Beverly pointed out to me, we CHOOSE our various lives and we
CHOOSE to be put into "traumatic" situations. Yes, talk to any
meta-physicist anywhere (see list of books below) and they all seem to
agree that we "chart" our lives before human incarnation. Every single
minute detail of our lives is painstakingly planned, like who we are
going to meet, what experiences we will go through...who we will work
with...marry...divorce etc.
So if we actually choose our entire
life, how can we ever consider ourselves a "victim" of anything? And if
we are never a victim of anything, how can we ever be angry at anybody?
The answer is we can't. Or we shouldn't. Anger is a complete waste of
time and harboring such negative feelings for prolonged periods of time
is a sign of immaturity. If only people started realizing this, the
world would probably be a much more peaceful place. Maybe there would be
less wars. Less murders. Corruption. Retribution. Revenge. Who knows?
Anyway,
Beverly eventually had me lie on a table and she "cleared" me of all
the negative energy I had accumulated during 13 of the 32 past lives.
The way in which Beverly conducts the clearing is a little difficult to
explain and would likely raise a lot of eyebrows, especially for the
average layman. It's very Shaman-like, actually. She essentially sucks
the bad energy out of your aura with her hands and then discards it
back into the bowels of the earth. Yes, this sounds strange as
anything, but you definitely feel a noticeable difference while she does
it. The place where she touches you usually gets very warm - sometimes
very hot. This heat is actually the energy being released from the
body. And afterward, you feel much lighter. A lot more relaxed.
During
my clearing, Beverly informed me that the negative energy from the past
lives had been affecting me on a physical level, as well as on an
emotional one. The energy was supposedly having an adverse effect on my
muscles, intestines, pituitary gland, pancreas, liver, brain and other
physical components of my physiology. Who would ever think that the
cause of a physical ailment could have roots in a past-life trauma?
Think about how many people out there have chronic physical problems
that baffle doctors? It's kind of a shame that the medical world never
thinks to look in the past for answers. Maybe they will as the human
race becomes more spiritually evolved.
Anyway, I feel like the
"cleansing" was what I needed all along. I think this was the main
reason why I was so drawn to my past lives in the first place. What
started out as sheer curiosity about reincarnation ended up leading me
to uncover the cause of my repressed rage and mysterious physical
issues. Hopefully the cleansing gradually makes me feel better as time
goes forward. Of course, I still have to go back to see Beverly so I can
have the other 19 lives cleared. But in the meantime I think I'm going
to notice a big change in my overall temperament, not to mention my
physical well-being.
Now, one thing you may be wondering about is
why I didn't just clear the traumas while I was on the "other side",
before I decided to become reincarnated in another body on earth. Why
couldn't I have just gotten God or whoever to help me deal with the
negativity while I was in spirit form and consciously aware of all that
happened in the past? Well, the problem is that when we're on the
"other side", the negativity doesn't affect us at all...mainly because
negativity doesn't exist. According to renowned psychic Sylvia Browne
in her book The Other Side and Back,
it's not until we go back into another body that the fears, anger,
victimization etc. terrorizes us again. We don't realize it on a
conscious level, but our subconscious mind fears that as long as we're
in a body again, there is the potential for more terrible things to
happen to us. So the cleansing is something that needs to be done while
we're in a body. In spirit form - where there is no fear and all energy
is positive - a cleansing would be absolutely pointless.
So,
anyway, hopefully the cleansing works for me. To be honest, I already
feel a hell of a lot better. It's like I've been wallowing in tar my
whole life and now I've finally been freed from its grips. We'll have to
see if the feeling lasts....
The following video is an audio clip from my cleansing session with Beverly:
For further reading about reincarnation and how we "chart" each of our lives:
